Hello,
Yes I know, its been forever. Remember that time I told you I was having trouble getting work because my JSS score went to 80%? Well, it's back to 100% now so every day I have to ask myself the question: to take this new job offer or no? The correct answer is no, of course, because my plate is pleasantly full, but the lessons of 'putting all my eggs in one basket' have had a lasting effect and I always think, "What if..?"
And so I consider every offer, as long as it's a good one. It's nice to have the luxury of immediately rejecting any offer that isn't financially sustainable. Of immediately rejecting the jobs I genuinely do not want to do because I hate the genre or they leave a slimy taste in my mouth or they're just not interesting.
The downside of all these clients, of course, is that I am left with very little time to pursue my own shit. Which means I haven't had the energy to update you on what's happening in the book world, or my world or give you unsolicited advice. I've also had to delay Marcus Devereux's release by another four months...sigh.
Being a one-person entrepreneurship has its challenges.
I'm not complaining. I know that if I got my shit together and truly got organized I'd spend less time in front of a computer screen because I'd get more done when I am in front of the screen. That's my bad.
Self-awareness is great.
What gave you these insights, you ask?
Well, I have recently been feeling rather like a fat ass who is gonna wake up one day and choke on their own neck (true story, I actually had a dream about it). So I woke up all scared and motivated to actually make time to do some form of exercise on the daily and not just when the mood takes me. I'm even thinking of risking getting in a public pool if the sun is out for two days in a row.
I also managed to find a leash my dog can't twist out of, so I'm using dog-walking time as also exercise time. Anyway, here I am, a little more active, and feeling like, 'Oh, so I have time to exercise allegedly and still work? What else can I fit into my routine? Taking time off? Doing my own thing?'
The possibilities are mind-blowing.
Weirdly enough, it also helps that Trump is out of office, which seems to have precipitated some sort of turning point in worldwide happenings. But also it gives people on my Twitter timeline space to talk about other things aside from hatred, white supremacy and how doomed we all are. My Twitter timeline is curated to have representation from different bubbles, and the tone and cadence of them all has changed now that The Orange One is out of office.
Which means doom-scrolling has changed to "Oh, that's happening over there better retweet for awareness, and oh, that's an interesting thought what do I think of it?' again. So I too felt free to go back to tweeting about Supernatural (the show), as well as anything I happened to be watching (Walker) or reading (Fanfic) and of course Social Justice.
Did you watch Judas and The Black Messiah yet?
I did.
Oh my God.
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| Fred Hampton |
This guy was 21 when he was killed and he already had life figured out. I think many of us do at that age because we see things clearly without the obscuring lens of Shades of Grey. And we have the confidence to speak on it.
Maybe we don't need to figure things out. We just have to remember.
I think we can thank Trump for its creation at this particular time. Without his blatant hatred and racism, this movie would never have been greenlit. But now everyone is so eager to bend over backwards to prove they're not like Cheeto Satan (newsflash, They are. They just hide it better) that they couldn't risk refusing to produce this movie.
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| Fred Hampton's grave is still riddled with bullet holes from White Supremacists who can't even let him rest in peace. |
All it took was one speech from Fred Hampton brilliantly channelled through Daniel Kaluuya.
What it came down to is loving yourself and loving the skin that you're in and loving your people. It was about selflessness and bravery and integrity. That's what being a revolutionary is. Living life out loud.
It was about opening your eyes and seeing the invisible network of connections that binds us all.
Watching it truly woke me up. I thought I was awake but I was just lying on my bed watching, commenting but not immersing myself in it all.
Fred Hampton through Daniel Kaluuya taught me that Love is Action.
I cannot claim to love myself if I'm abusing my body with endless sitting, working, not resting, barely eating...everything cannot be about work. Disappearing down the rabbit hole of Daniel Kaluuya interviews in the aftermath of Judas and the Black Messiah made me think, even more, look around me more, and realize that I can Do More.
Daniel said something about 'abandoning himself' to the service of the characters he was playing and I could really relate to that in terms of abandoning myself to my work in service to my clients. Such blatant neglect of self should be criminal.
But Capitalism.
In one of his interviews, Daniel mentioned that he was listening to a musician named Omah Lay from Nigeria. Now I'm not a real fan of Naija music through no fault of its own. It's just that Kenyan musicians love to copy what's popular and so there was a time when the proliferation of Naija-inspired music was ubiquitous and annoying. I will say that Kenyan musicians seem to have gotten their shit together since and are now producing some truly inspiring music.
Shout out to Sauti Sol as usual.
Anyway, so because he mentioned it, I went to find Omah Lay on Deezer and I have to agree that yes, absolutely, that was some good shit.
It struck me then, how word of mouth works. I downloaded Judas and the Black Messiah because people were talking about it on Twitter and I was interested in what they were saying. I watched it and it struck me so much I'm now urging everyone I know to watch it - including you.
And that led me down the rabbit hole of interviews because I wanted to Know More; about Fred Hampton, about William O'Neil and about Daniel Kaluuya. Which led me to discover a new musician and text my son to check him out.
And that's how word of mouth works. So I'm asking you, if you read and enjoyed anything I've written, tell someone...and that's my self-serving plot twist.
