A Voyage of Discovery

 So I've been spending all my time working and trolling on Twitter which might not be the best use of my time I will admit. Well, the work has been very beneficial but I'm not sure about the trolling.

It's just that I've been reading things on there.

About being neurodivergent.

And I'll be damned if it doesn't sound like me.

It kind of freed me, to know that my character flaws - the brutal honesty especially - might just be a condition of my neurology and therefore completely out of my hands. I've been seeing a lot of Kenyans on the journey of discovery, finding out about their neurodivergence as adults, chronic medical conditions, mental health issues, sexual awakenings...and every story triggers a reaction in me.

Do I have that?

Am I that?

I'm 46 years old and I'm still discovering new things about myself. It's nice. You can't be finding new things and feeling old.

There's a curious freedom to knowing who you are or in the process of self-discovery because you let go of expectation and deal with reality. It's fun too. Happy making.

There are just so many people out there who are not happy right now and they take out their misery by trying to make other people unhappy - hence the uptick in my trolling. People stay coming for my faves and I have the skills to make them have a seat - so why not use them?

Besides it hones my wit and my clapbacks which I can then turn around and use in my stories. 

win win.

I lied before it seems.

It is good use of my time to troll.

Just this last month, we had someone trying to harsh Jared Padalecki's usually very mellow vibe, which led to a whole three days of #weloveyoujaredpadalecki trending on twitter and a campaign of giving to TWLOHA. 

That's what I call doing trolling right. 

Of course the troll still insisted that Jared was hating on her because his fans made him trend for three day because of her comments. *rolls eyes right off my head* 

Why are these people like this?

Jared is really helping me with the motivation to get fit. That, and moving to a house not on a hill and so easy to walk to and from. Also swimming pool. 

Not to jinx it but this is a good time in my life.

I'm even finding time to work on my book and my fanfiction. 

I don't know if anyone is still even interested in Marcus Devereux but that's not the point. 

I am interested.

I wanna see how it ends. 

If anyone else cares to come on the journey with me that's great. You're welcome and it's definitely worth it.

I've seen a lot of white authors on the internet today, complaining about Meghan Markle and her new children's book that is being released. Apparently her writing a book automatically negates the efforts of thousands of hypothetical authors and ensures they'll never be published. I'm guessing all these authors are white middle aged women with 80s hair, and unseasoned books about raisins in potato salad.

I snorted when I read that. 

Nobody can take your shit away from you. If it's yours, then it's yours. Nobody can come along and take that away from you. It's 100% jealously and anger that the Sussexes are not failing at their new life once they ran away from home. 

You know how it feels when you wanted desperately for people to fail and come crawling back to you and then they insist on prospering and not needing you at all? 

I hear it's painful. 

I think my neurodivergent ass is not capable of feeling such time wasting emotion or maybe that's just me but like I said, I'm enjoying the mudita of it all. I love to see people prosper without thinking it will impact my own prosperity.

Mudita? Look it up. Chrissy Teigen taught us all this word this week.

What does affect my prosperity is you buying into me, and my stories. I hope you can still do that even though I'm neglecting you as fuck.

I'm sorry, okay? I might be here a little less than I was, but I'm still here. Just expanding my repertoire a bit. I might even do a new episode of my podcast. 

Just coz.

Anyways, back to work. I hope this blog post makes sense.