Thursday, 6 August 2026

The Chickens Come Home

So I, like many of you, watched the World Cup and therefore came to know the phenomenon that is Sergio Ramos In a Suit. After I was done fanning myself and wondering how I never noticed him before, I was struck by how much he looked like every mafia protagonist I've ever read about. Right down to the tattoos. 

It was too much temptation for me and I found that I was inspired to write fanfic about him. Given how rare inspiration is these days, I took it as A Sign. 

And so...we have the following ficlet as the result. 

Just a disclaimer; I know nothing about Sergio Ramos or Luka Modric or even Rene Ramos. They're just pretty faces I coopted for my own entertainment. 

As The Roaming Chef would say after wrangling a crocodile and cooking it...Enjoy.


"It's time for you to come home."


Sergio looked up to see his big brother Rene standing at the door to his gym. He expelled a breath, turning back to the weights he was lifting.


"Says who?" he asked.


Rene stepped in the room, looking impeccable in his black bespoke Tom Ford suit. He stared at Sergio, his gaze uncompromising. "You've had your fun. You wanted to play football. We let you. But Padre is dead now. I need my underboss back."


Sergio put down his weights, straightened up and looked at his brother. "Rene-"


"No. I don't want to hear it Serg. Pack your things. You're coming home."


Sergio sighed. "I can't."


Rene narrowed his eyes at his brother. "Why not?"


Sergio didn't want to say. His brother loved him. He knew that. But he couldn't exactly tell him that he didn't want to leave Luka. 


"Is it Luka?" Rene asked.


Sergio jerked in surprise. "How did...?"


Rene smirked. "You think there's anything about you I don't know?"


"Serg are you do-" Luka burst into the room and then came to a freezing stop when he caught sight of Rene. His eyes widened. "What are you doing here?"

Sergio looked from Rene to Luka. "You two know each other?"

Rene and Luka continued to stare at each other. Sergio narrowed his eyes at Luka who seemed to be apprehensive. 

"Of course we don't." Luka squeaked.

Sergio glared at his brother. "What is this?" he demanded.

Rene shrugged. "You think I'd let someone get close to you and not know everything about them?"

Luka turned to look at Sergio, his eyes apologetic. "I didn't want you to know. 

Sergio glared at him. "Know what exactly?"

Luka sighed, drifting over to Sergio and placing his hand gently against Sergio's waist. He looked him in the eye. "I didn't want you to think that it was the only reason I was with you."

"What was the only reason?" Sergio growled.

Rene huffed. "What he's trying to say is that when I saw how you looked at him, I had a background check done. When it came back clean, I...encouraged him to seduce you."



Sergio stared at his brother in disbelief. "Why would you do that?" he asked, taking a step away from Luka.

"Because I wanted you to be happy." Rene said with exasperation. 

Sergio narrowed his eyes at his brother, "So you...what? Pimped Luka out to me?" he stepped towards his brother, looming over him menacingly.

"Serg!" Luka said in a scandalized tone.

Rene rolled his eyes. "Of course not. You're going to tell me that you wouldn't have known if the feelings weren't real?"

Sergio blinked at his brother, brought up short by that. The feelings of betrayal that had been rising up in him subsided. He looked at Luka, who was watching him with a hurt expression. He stepped towards the other man, who took a step back, lips pursing, arms crossed. His lashes swept down, covering his eyes, hiding his expression from Sergio.

"Luka, I'm sorry. I didn't mean..." he gave an exasperated sigh. "You lied to me!"

Luka nodded. "I guess I did."

Sergio reached out and wrapped his hand around Luka's arm pulling him closer. "I love you." he said, almost pleading.

Luka raised his eyes, misty with tears. "I love you too. I'm sorry I didn't tell you about meeting your brother before but I was scared that it might put you off."

Sergio gave a half smirk his lip rising on one side. "Nothing could put me off you." he declared.

Luka flushed, falling into Sergio's arms. "That's a relief."

Sergio turned to look at Rene, Luka still firmly encased in his arms. "You see why I can't leave?"

Rene gave him a look. "I didn't say that you had to leave Luka, now did I?"

Sergio stared at him, blinking in disbelief and then looked down at Luka. "Would you...?"

Luka smiled, "Come with you? Be your mafia wife? Ask me and see." 

Sergio let out an exasperated huff. "Luka Modric, would you come home with me, be my partner and take the oath?"

Luka lifted his chin, his lips pursing. "Kiss me Sergio." he whispered. 

Sergio leaned down and pressed his lips to Luka's. 

"Yes." Luka said against his lips before taking control of the kiss, tongue thrusting into Sergio's mouth, their tongues tangling as Luka did his best to devour him. 

"I take it that means you're coming home Sergio?" Rene's voice butted in much to Sergio's annoyance.

He grunted, lifting his head briefly to nod at his brother before resuming the searing kiss he'd been sharing with Luka. Something in his chest loosened. He'd always dreaded this day.


The day he'd have to choose between his Family and his Love. But now it looked like he wouldn't  have to.