On Taking Back Your Power and Owning Your Shit

I read an Instagram post today, by Rose McGowan. Do you know her? She was the new sister in Charmed once Shannen Doherty left. Are y'all old enough to have seen Charmed?
Anyways.
Here's the post.

I remember wanting to cry that day. Well everyday really. Every day I filmed this movie. I was pressured into doing it for all the wrong reasons ( big @UTA agentess known for her cruelty and I believe hatred of beautiful young women.) This woman who was meant to develop and further my career pushed me to do my first studio film. It was called Ready to Rumble and it was expected to be a hit. I threw the script in the trash 3 times. But I hadn't worked since the sexual assault. I didn't want to do this movie. It was stupid as hell. I was told by my agent that if I did this big studio film @warnerbros would put me in the next Clint Eastwood film. It wasn't a bad set, I just didn't want to there. Every day I was pushed to be an over the top sex object and nothing else. Written by basics, captured and filmed by a man, produced by men, edited by a man, music by men, sold to theaters by men and on your screens courtesy of men. And I was sold into it by a woman. On set I mostly tried to project out of my body and into a safe place on the astral plane. Look at what my eyes say in this picture. You may see a hot young chick, I see reinforcement of stereotypes, horrible career management, and personal vacancy. While my body was left on earth and got stuck being embarrassed, not valued and to serve as only the sexy object in a film. Sent to tittilate young boys and make girls aspire to be me cos I turned their boy on. See how that works? In my book BRAVE, I am pulling back the iron curtain. This is not a tell. This is a tell it how it is. - Rose McGowan 'excerpt from BRAVE the book' coming in February @harperonebooks LINK for pre-order in bio ☝️☝️ #brave #rosearmy #anarmyofthought

A post shared by Rose McGowan (@rosemcgowan) on Sep 3, 2017 at 4:49pm PDT

And I was thinking earlier how people have the absolute wrong reactions to things, and what the appropriate reaction is to a certain thing. For example, President Trump telling victims of #HurricaneHarvey to 'have a good time'...clearly something is missing somewhere. Is it sociopathy do you think? Or just lack of empathy? His mama didn't bring him up right? He just could not absolutely care less?
We seem to lack a lot in the empathy department these days.
So here I was, reading this post, and I figured that the expected appropriate reaction would be...what? pity? sympathy? outrage at Hollywood? At the 'woman' who 'sold Rose out?'
I don't know.
I'm serious.
Tell me what the appropriate reaction is.
Because I suspect that my reaction was a bit to the left of the field.
When I read it, this proverb was going through my head;

Rose points the finger at her agent, at Hollywood studios...says she wanted to throw the script in the bin but...Clint Eastwood movie! So okay according to her she had to sell her soul to Crowley in order to get what she wanted. 

According to my understanding of how demon deals work, you have to agree to it yes? You seal the deal with a kiss and you hand over your soul. So then what? Do you blame the devil for taking it? The devil's just doing his job. Willing buyer, willing seller.

To agree to do a trashy piece of work and then to turn around and say, "The woman agent sold me out" and "Hollywood made promises they (didn't?) deliver." is to sell your soul and then complain about the devil buying it.

This. is. your. shit.
Own it.
Rose wanted something. She felt like this was one way to get it. It didn't work out for her. Or it did. I don't know. I just know that shaming that agent for being cut throat and ruthless and doing her job because she is a woman is everything feminism should be against right? Why expect this woman agent to coddle you? Or baby sit or whatever the fuck she expected? The agent is working hard for her money, earning her commissions. If you're uncomfortable with the job, it isn't slavery, you can say no.

You can quit. You can find another way.
But you didn't.
That was your choice, Rose.
Yours.
Not your woman agent's.
Not Hollywood's.
I get that this is a very unsympathetic way to look at it but life is hard man. Reality is harsh. Gotta learn to deal with that shit.

Speaking of owning things and taking my power back, She Leads Africa did a feature on me in August about how I took my power back from publishers who weren't even willing to use lubricant. You can read it here.

Who is the Real Femme Icon?

So I was walking around the supermarket, humming the theme song for Game of Thrones and wondering why anyone in their right mind wouldn't be watching it.
I'm sorry but it just bugs me.
And y'all say it like you're showing off.

When in reality you're missing out on some of the greatest TV to ever television.
Oh well.
Not what this post is about.
This post is about La Femme and being over-dramatic about Wonderwoman.
I was scrolling on Tumblr about the time Wonderwoman came out and there was a lot of excitement from white Tumblr about Gal Gadot being all, au naturel. I read this one post going on about how every wrinkle and cellulite on the Amazons was highlighted in 3D. And how empowering that was for women etc etc and so on and so forth.
Now ever since I was a kid and Wonderwoman was a cartoon on TV, she had never managed to excite my interest. Never been 'my' super hero.
Frankly, I don't get the hype.
So I watched the movie very begrudgingly just because peer pressure.
#SpoilersAhead
I had a number of complaints.
First of all, they jacked the Captain America script.
Only they left out all the human connections which made Captain America: The First Avenger and all subsequent sequels great.

There was no Bucky equivalent and quite frankly they did not get me invested in the interactions between the Amazons or between her group of 'fighters' who were just mirrors of Steve Roger's gang of army Marauders (minus Bucky - I cannot emphasize that enough).
And what was that love interest?
Oh my God whatever Chris Pine's character's name was cannot compare to Peggy Carter. And I have a question. Were there no British actors available? Did they ask Tom Hardy? Did he say no? It was weird.
I have to put a disclaimer here because Chris Pine has attempted to make me care about him in many movies and so far has failed.
All in all, Wonderwoman didn't make me feel like going out there and slaying the hell out of life.

Furthermore, she was supposed to be this run of the mill everyday woman. Look at her. That is not run of the mill or every day. That is some statuesque, ripped, beautiful, sexy womanhood.
And then there is Arya Stark.
A girl.

She's just an ordinary girl. The last born of several boys and a very girly girl. Her sister was the kind of girl other girls want to be.
She wasn't like them though.
She wanted to learn sword play and not needle point.
"Stick 'em with the pointy end." Jon Snow told her when he gave her Needle. Little did he know...
She didn't wake up wanting her hair well coiffed, her clothes perfectly styled.
She woke up like this. But she was flawless anyway.
And when push comes to shove, she was like the most BADASS person, male or female, on screen.

"The North remembers." she said, after exterminating a roomful of men.
Now that made me feel empowered.
That made me feel a bit of warmth in my chest, pride, happiness, like that time Brazil won the world cup when Ronaldo, Rivaldo and Roberto Carlos were still playing. Just...crack. Or how I assume crack makes you feel.

So people are still busy looking for some mythical role model when there she has been for seven years.
Right in front of you.
I love Arya Stark.
She's my favorite serial killer.
But my real role model in this game called life, aside from myself, my mother and my son is....
You guessed it.

This picture was taken today from her meeting with the President of France where she discussed the education of the girl child specifically in Africa. Now we all know that Macron talked some smack about Africa's problem being we have too many children or some shit like that. I don't even care about his ignorant ass. But considering what an ignorant ass he is, he was still eating out of the Queen's hand and offering to launch more programs geared at education in Africa in spite of his views.
That my people is why Rihanna will now and always be the Queen of my heart and the only role model I need. Where she came from, and where she is now, in just ten short years is mind boggling.
And it's real life.