Sunday, 26 June 2016

Be Your Own Anchor

What gets you out of bed in the morning?
For me it's various things; having to pay rent on this house that I like so much takes prominent place on that list, making sure my son has food and clothes and an education, wanting to know what happened next...
On those days when my arm aches from so much typing, when I just want to blow it off and binge watch TV; those are the things that help me to find a way to keep going. Also I love my job.
I love my life.
When I hear people say things like, "I have nothing to live for", it really seriously kills my vibe.
And it reminds me of that time when Scott  was down, about to lose his cool and couldn't find a way to make it stop. Mama McCall stepped in and said to him;

Mama McCall is my spirit animal. She's the mother I want to be when I grow up. She always seems to know the right thing to say in any given situation. I never do.
One of my family members is going through it right now and as I was walking to the bus stop with my son, I was thinking about anchors, and how he maybe doesn't have one. This person, lost his mother young and has no children. Maybe he doesn't have that person to hold him down.
I know that my son has been an anchor for me ever since he was conceived. I remember at my mother's funeral, we were standing in the receiving line and he was upset. And then he looks around and sees that everyone is being hugged. So he turns around in my arms and reaches out to the next person in the condolence line and hugs them. Everyone laughed. It was a light moment at a dark time. He's always been able to provide that, even without his knowledge.
What happens when you don't have that? When Scott broke up with Alison who was the one keeping him grounded, keeping his feet on the ground, keeping him from setting adrift on memory bliss (R.I.P P.M. Dawn); then his mother stepped in and told him to Be His Own Anchor.
The world is hard and sometimes we feel like shit; like maybe it isn't worth living. Like there's no reason to wake up in the morning.
No body.
No passion.
No thing.
But the thing with anchors is, they can be anything; all it has to do is give you a reason. A reason to want to see tomorrow. Even if it's temporarily. Just until you find that permanent one.
For me for example, I remember that the next installment of +Harry Potter was a reason to keep going ever since I found the first, second and third one in the British Council library. I had to wait for +JK Rowling  to write the next one, and then the next after that, and the one after that...It was a reason to live. And then I discovered Outlander in one of those pop up bookshops and here I am, eagerly awaiting book nine. Praying for Diana Gabaldon on the daily that she doesn't die before I read about Jamie and Claire's reunion with Brianna and Roger and their kids. I'm also eagerly awaiting October 14th, the day after +Supernatural season 12 debuts so I can find out how Dean reacted to having his mother back.
It's been a difficult 2015-2016 by all accounts. These things give me reasons to be happy. To look forward to life and living.

Everyone can find their own thing that can do the same for them. A reason to keep going when life sucks balls. In the meantime, listen to mama McCall...

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